Enterprising series (A Star Trek: Enterprise Review)

These are the voyages, of the dumb-dumb RedheadRob. His mission, to watch every Star Trek series, to seek out nerd life, and nerd civilizations, to meekly wander where several others have gone before! (So, spoilers ahead… Yeah.)

               Check out 8 Bit Universe on youtube, btw. They rock!

So I just finished the most recent Star Trek series. Star Trek: Enterprise. Starring my favorite person who controls your actions, while you go unaware you were ever possessed! Scott Bakula!

This show is actually really creepy/fetish-y, if you think about it.

The story of Star Trek early history, before all the JJ Abrams time travel wibble wobble stuff, Enterprise is a really, really, really, REALLY slow starting show. I didn’t connect with many characters, they had fucking Dean Stockwell in that one episode (We get it Rob, you know Quantum Leap existed.) It was kind of a mess in the beginning, but just like growing up gay, it gets better.

I can’t explain what is so bad about the show at first, the theme song doesn’t help, I’d link it here, but then I would have to listen to it for any amount of time, and that is just an unrealistic concept. They change the theme to be more energetic later on, further driving the point home that it gets better as the series goes.

Captain Archer, and his vulcan 2nd officer T’pol (played by Jolene Blalock) head off in the first Starfleet exploration mission. I guess part of my dislike is the weird first storyline, which gives away the ending of the series instantly, and I don’t mean you can connect the clues, they flat out tell you what will happen. It shoots the series right in the foot. They have alternate universe episodes, meeting new species, all the Star Trek stuff, including the occasional piece of technology that shouldn’t exist. (time travel, yay.)

Trip Tucker ( Connor Trinneer.) is pretty much the only other character I want to mention, just because his character develops the most throughout the whole series. The Doctor, Phlox ( John Billingsley.) is also a pretty interesting character, but what can I say? Star trek doctors are always OP when it comes to solving medical problems, so it’s hard for me to enjoy.

The show has classic star trek flaws, if you don’t like how they just pull the solution right outta their asses near the end of each episode, you won’t like this one, and if you’re a trek fan you’ll still probably roll your eyes a couple times. It’s not perfect, but what Trek series is?

Dat last episode? What the fuck were they thinking? “Hey guys? How about for shits and giggles, we give them one last Star Trek: The Next Generation episode? What’s the worst that can happen?” Riker, and Troi talking to each other during the events of TNG episode “The Pegasus,” The cast of the show Enterprise are all just holodeck simulations, everything you’re experiencing in the episode suddenly feels like a history lesson, which sucks all the passion out of the experience, they kill off one of the main cast for no discernible reason, it’s all over the place.

Oh well, those are my thoughts. I hope you enjoyed my 3 part journey through the Trek series I hadn’t watched yet. I guess we’re done for now, until this supposed new series comes out.

Wait!? Do you hear that?! What is th- OH GOD! It- it can’t be! No, no! Stay back! AHHH!

To be continued…

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